tisdag 16 mars 2010

9. You might be a redneck if..




  1. On your job application under "SEX" you put "As often as possible".
  2. During your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.
  3. You're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.
  4. On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.
  5. Your parakeet knows the phrase "Open up, Police!".
  6. You saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deerhunting.
  7. In tough situations you ask yourself, "What would Curly do?".
  8. Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
  9. You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines." or "Play Ball..."
  10. Your child's first words are "Attention K-Mart shoppers!".
  11. Your wife's best pair of shoes are steel-toed Red Wings.
  12. You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.
  13. You bring your dog to work with you.
  14. You replace a flat tire on your truck with a tire from your house.
  15. You've ever put a six-pack in a casket right before they closed it
  16. Your family's No. 1 enemy is revenuers.
  17. Your belt buckle doubles as a serving platter.
  18. You use lava soap more than three times a day.
  19. You wear cowboy boots with Bermuda shorts.
  20. You have a hook in your shower to hang your hat on.
  21. You buy your wife tube socks at the flea market.
  22. You consider orange peels left on the coffee table as potpourri.
  23. You grow flowers in an old commode in your front yard.
  24. You can't take a bath because beer is iced down in your tub.
  25. Your kitchen doubles as a bait store.
  26. You've ever picked up a woman in a convenience store.
  27. You throw a beer can out the truck window and your wife shoots it.
  28. You've ever fed your date french fries in a Denny's.
  29. Going to the laundromat means cleaning out the back of the truck.
  30. Your family reunion features a chewing tobacco spit-off.

Inga kommentarer: