3. You might be a redneck if..

1. someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle.
   
2. The primary color of your car is bondo.
   
3. directions to your house include "Turn off the paved road."
   
4. your dog and your wallet are both on a chain.
   
5. you owe the taxidermist more than your annual income.
   
6. you ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.
   
7. Jack Daniels makes you list of most admired people.
   
8. your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
   
9. you see no need to stop at a rest stop 'cause you have an empty milk jug.
   
10. you consider the fifth grade you senior year.
    
11. you have a rag for a gas cap.
    
12. the dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
    
13. you have a hefty bag where the window of your car should be.
    
14. you have ever bar-b-qued Spam on the grill.
    
15. your brother-in-law is also your uncle.
    
16. Redman Chewing Tobacco sends you a Christmas card.
    
17. you bought a VCR because wrestling comes on while you're at work.
    
18. your dad walks you to school because you're in the same grade.
    
19. you view the next family reunion as a chance to meet girls.
    
20. your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.
    
21. your front porch collapses and kills more than five dogs.
    
22. the main course at potluck dinners is roadkill.
    
23. you mow the front yard and find a car.
    
24. your other truck is made by John Deere.
    
25. you think suspenders are a type of shirt.
    
26. going to the bathroom at night involves shoes and a flashlight.
    
27. you keep a spit cup on the ironing board.
    
28. you ever got too drunk to fish.
    
29. More than one living relative is named after a southern civil war general.
    
30. Your front porch collapses and more than six dogs are killed.