onsdag 10 mars 2010

5. You might be a redneck if..



  1. You think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
  2. You think that Campho-Phenique is a miracle drug.
  3. The first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are "Howdy!" "HEY!" or "How Y'all Doin?"
  4. You have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.
  5. Your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.
  6. You think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.
  7. You think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.
  8. You've ever been too drunk to fish.
  9. You had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
  10. You've ever used a weedeater indoors.
  11. You have a rag for a gas cap (on a car that does run).
  12. You consider a family reunion a good place to pick up girls.
  13. You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.
  14. Your richest relative invites you over to his new home to help him remove the wheels and skirt.
  15. You've ever financed a tattoo.
  16. Your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack.
  17. You go to a tupperware party for a haircut.
  18. You have spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
  19. Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.
  20. Your dog and your wallet are both on chains.
  21. Your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mudflaps.
  22. You owe the taxidermist more than your annual income.
  23. You have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.
  24. Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".
  25. You won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
  26. Your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
  27. You have a Hefty bag on the passenger side window of your car.
  28. You have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occassions.
  29. You have to scratch your sisters name out of the message: "for a good time call . .", because you feel guilty about putting it there...
  30. Redman sends you a Christmas card.

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